In an effort to challenge myself and push my personal growth I have been trying to participate in activities/experiences that make me uncomfortable. One of those acts is going to events alone. Historically if I see an event that I would like to attend, I will ask a friends go with me. If I can’t find anyone to be my guest I simply won’t go. This results in me not going at all, staying at home, and “Netflix and Chilling” until I pass out. Shortly after I have FOMO because I didn’t go when I could’ve just gone by myself. I tend to have a bit of social anxiety in some settings so going out alone is never really on my radar. When I was younger and tried to do this often and would fail. I would pull up to the venue, try to coach myself into getting out the car and would end up driving home. I am proud to say that lately that has not been my experience. I have gone out lately a couple of times solo and have ended up having a great time.
The latest of this personal is attending the Pastries & Portraits x Smile a Day event. It was held at Maker’s Loft in Downtown Oakland. There was really great music, specialty drinks, and bottomless pastries for guests to enjoy while mingling, enjoying the artwork, or waiting for their photo shoot session. Not only did I go solo(challenge #1), I ALSO participated in the photo shoot experience (challenge #2).
I have never been a fan of having someone else take my picture. Partly due to some self image challenges( I’ll save that for another blog) and also don’t enjoy a whole bunch of focus on me. I naturally tend to choose supportive roles in these type situations so me being the focus was scaryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
However the photographer, Selena. Helped to get me comfortable and calm the whole way through. She really has a gift with being able to connect and get great images (I ‘m a perfect example of this.) In the end I am proud of completing the personal challenge I set for myself and achieve results. That quote “a picture is worth a thousand words” is so very true. Looking at my finished photos you couldn’t tell that I was so nervous that glow is actually me sweating bullets, trying to not do awkward corny poses, and second guessing why the hell did I decide to do this in the first place. When I look at my finished photos I see a woman who is addicted to personal growth, loves meeting new people, a general bad ass, and will continue to stunt on life even when it gets hard.